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The ADHD Iceberg

1/22/2018

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When I picture ADHD I think of an iceberg. Above the water are all the symptoms and behaviors that are visible. The disorganization, hyperactivity, impulsivity, to name a few. You get the picture. All the ways ADHD trips us up for us and the world to see. Yet just like an iceberg,under the surface lies an even more massive body of issues related to ADHD. These are the underlying feelings, emotions and struggles presented by ADHD that no one ever sees and we might not even recognize as part of the having ADHD.
There is the shame and self esteem issues, depression, anxiety, confusion, and so much more that can be part of the picture of ADHD. Much of which has slowly built up over time a result of negative feedback and reactions of others over the years or our own negative explanations for why we are like we are.

When seeking treatment for ADHD it is important to address the entire iceberg especially what lies beneath the surface. Coaches who are also trained clinically are the best resource to deal with the ADHD iceberg.
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Consistently Inconsistent

1/15/2018

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Consistently Inconsistent is how I describe the forward progress when one has ADHD. In spite of our best efforts to create habits or  keep up with a plan we inevitably fall of the rails.  This could be just a brief hiccup or a more extended hiatus from remembering to take medication, or being on time or putting our keys in the place we decided they should go. When this happens, and it will, it is best to see it as part of the process. Progress not perfection. It is much more healthy and helpful to focus instead on the period of time we were consistent rather than beat ourselves up about not following through. By staying positive it is much easier to get back on track which is all that matters. Take some time to evaluate whether there is anything you can do to increase your consistency. A better place for the keys, better reminders etc. Sometimes it is just the need to refocus on the behavior we are trying to maintain. 
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Happy New Year

1/1/2018

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A new beginning! The making of resolutions. We ADDers often get a rush of excitement starting fresh. Best intentions to do it different be it get organized, be on time, follow through, finish what we start seem possible. So why after a few days, weeks, a month do we find ourselves back to the same old. Well, partly it's the nature of ADD "consistently inconsistent". We lose focus, get distracted even briefly and it's hard to get back on track or it just keeps happening we can't seem to stick with it. Good intentions alone cannot overcome our ADD brains. So what's the answer? I wish it were simple (how many times have we all said this to ourselves) but it isn't. It is possible to make progress. Try some of these suggestions as you go forward in the New Year.
  • Keep it simple. Pick one small thing you want to work on such as not misplacing your keys, wallet, phone so you are not rushing around trying to leave the house on time but can't find at least one of these items.
  • You will need to develop a strategy or plan ex. designate a specific place to put your stuff 
  • Make the strategy work for you.There is no right, wrong or perfect plan or strategy. The place to put your stuff is the place that makes sense to you.
  • Work on developing a habit which experts say takes 30 days. In this case always putting your stuff in it's designated place immediately upon getting home. 
  • Make it your one priority. Nothing is more important when you get home than immediately putting your stuff in it's special place.
  • If you are having trouble being consistent up the intervention add another strategy. Put an alarm in your phone that goes off everyday at a time you will likely be home that says Put stuff in it's place.
  • Ask for help. Outside structure is always helpful even if we bristle about it. Use a spouse, friend or coach to help set external parameters.
  • Be compassionate and kind to yourself. This does not mean let yourself off the hook or don't hold yourself accountable. It just means you don't beat yourself up if you aren't perfect.Progress not perfection. If you are being 75% successful that is still success. 
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    Lois Callahan

    I am passionate about helping others with ADHD learn strategies and live successfully. 

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